Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Have you ever considered yourself a jerk?

There has been a couple of times I look back on things, and realize without intending it, I came across as a HUGE dick. This is one of the few times I was intentionally an asshole without trying to make someone laugh. Like I was a legit fuck head here. One time was when I had to drop Izzy off at a bank so she could cash her check. There was like no place to park here, at all, so i pulled around to this apartment complex which is part of the parking lot where I could stop to let Izzy out. Just as I do, I notice this old fart who was just chatting with who looked like the bank manager make a B line for me the second I let Izzy out. Izzy isn't even out of the car yet, and he gets right up on me an says "You can't park your car here!". I was all calm about it at first and said "I'm just letting her out", and he kinda gives me a look over and walks back off with the bank manager. I get back in the jeep and a car pulls right infront of us, and since the parking lot is so busy, we can't move. So, I just sat in the driver's seat and went back to a text argument I was having with my friend Sarah. I wasn't paying attention and the car infront of me moved... just as the Bag of Bones came back out of the bank. My friend Jeff was with me and said "Roger, he's coming back". Another car pulls infront of me, but this one I could pass... but at this point, something about this guy was really pissing me off. The way he darted right at me the second the car stopped just so I could let someone out, they way he just about barked that I couldn't park there (not like I was blocking traffic like other cars in the lot), the tone of his voice, and the sheer fact that he was coming straight for my jeep after just exiting the bank... oooooh man was this guy gonna get it.

Sure enough, the first words outta his mouth was "I told you to move your car!". He barely finished his sentence before I exploded on him. Top of my lungs, fire in my eyes, sheer "who the fuck do you think you are?!" tone in my voice, enraged at his inability to have sympathy for an over crowded parking lot, just trying to drop a girl off so she could have some money to get her through the week. And, like I said before, it wasn't like I was in an apartment parking spot or blocking traffic... I was off to the side against a concrete wall! After I was done (I find that somehow when I have done this in the past, I have incredible self control to not curse, which is very unlike me and something I will never understand) he gave me a good stare down like he was gonna swing. I didn't care and just went back to texting. After a moment of trying to stare me down, he walked off. About a minute later, I look up in my rear view and see him right behind my car, joting down my plate number. At this point I was thinking "what's he gonna do? Cry to the cops about something that, at worst, would amount to a $20 parking ticket? Or get off with a whimpering, childish voice "He yelled at me!"? I didn't care. I had enough of this asshole, saw that I could leave now, did, and just called Izzy and told her to meet us across the street.

I still kinda feel like a dick, coz I usually try to be polite to strangers and chalk something up as a mis-understanding, or in most bad case scenarios, kill 'em with kindness, but this guy just had it coming. I have only ever done something like that 3 or 4 other times in my life, and I always feel shaken up after I do, but that was one of the few, and most recent times I was intentionally a jerk.

Just don't hurt me!


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